Sunday, July 31, 2011

This Is The Day

“Yet to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God— children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband’s will, but born of God.” John 1:12-13

Have you made the decision?

These guys have...>>

So let the celebration commence...>>

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Jews For Jesus

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us."Hebrews 12:1

One of the many fliers thrust at me this morning.

This one was worth taking.

Hood Rats


Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Rise and Grind

I'm not ignoring you.

Or avoiding the task of dutiful writing.

But I've lost track of time in the production machine.

And sleep is precious.

Taxing my clouded, early waking mind ranks low.

But grateful for the job.
And that the man screaming..."Keeeler, Keeler, He's a Keeeler, Look Out Keeler*" on the train was delusion.

*Killer

Sunday, July 24, 2011

My first day at the new Law & Order gig was 14 hours (not including 4 trains worth of travel) in 103 degrees temperatures.

Tomorrow (my 2nd day of "testing") is anybody's guess.



Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Hubris Stained Humility

"Where there is strife, there is pride, but wisdom is found in those who take advice." Proverbs 13:10

My very liberal and very pregnant Brooklynite, writing teacher had our class eating from the palm of her bleeding heart as she critiqued a Stephen King short story and the political undertones regarding the atrocities of the welfare dependent poor and the spoiled disgust of the smart and successful who look the other way.

My blood boiling, I spoke the words, " Personal Choice and Consequences."

I am a young victim and old victor of both.

And this makes us who we are supposed to become.

My parents divorced when I was barely 11 years old.
And in the aftermath, each of us made our own decisions and had to gain our own version of control....

Stop me if this strikes a chord.

Do you "help" other people drive - tell them what route to take, when to turn, where to park, remind them that the traffic light has changed? ( me, mama, daddy)

Do you give people a lot of "shoulds" - unsolicited advice, suggestions, and "constructive criticism?" (me, mama, daddy)

Do you have lots of personal rules, routines, and ceremonies? (me, daddy)

Are you the one who takes over and orders other people around when the situation seems confused? (me)

Do you dislike depending on others, accepting help from them, or allowing them to do things for you? (Mama)

Do you insist on "being right," having things done your way, or having the final word? (me, Mama, Daddy)

Do you "over-plan" simple activities? (me, Daddy)

Do you find it difficult to admit making mistakes, being wrong or misinformed about something, or acknowledging that you've changed your mind? (me, Mama, Daddy)

Do you become angry, irritable, or anxious when someone or something makes you late, when things don't start on time, or things don't go according to plan? (me)

So what does this make us and just where has it gotten us?

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Urge For Going...But

Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and he will establish your plans. Proverbs 16:3

"A New Yorker is a person with an almost inordinate interest in mental health, which is only natural considering how much of that it takes to live here."

-The New York Times


Still, regardless of the fact that mine (mental stability) is suspect.

I have bound hands with the powers of Dick Wolf and comrades to work the entire season of the quintessential New York show....Law and Order.

Which keeps me here and insane a little longer.

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Painted Ponies Go Round And Round

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."Romans 8:28

It's funny how motives can change in an instant.
With one flick of the wrist. Or an affirmative reply.

Last night I found myself at a Brooklyn barbecue sharing surrealistic sentimentality's with my contemporaries in a tomato garden. As we pulled grilled mussels from their hot shells and clinked our glasses of Chardonnay from the Coleman cooler, we smiled and nodded at the common notion of leaving New York.

As the farmers market corn husks blackened on the grill and the PBR drenched whole Mackerel caught that morning soaked up the lemon squeeze, we cracked a bottle of chilly Rose and thew our heads back in agreement, this city is tough.

While the citronella torches crackled in the breeze and upstate dairy butter dripped from our chins, the producer, illustrator, photographer, writer, fashion designer, and actress listened to the frisky Irish landlord describe the city 50 years ago, and decided yes indeed, we missed this town's Golden Age.

Collectively we've followed our hearts, sought a dream, and fought for it's fruition.
And at that moment, despite our worries of finding a good cup of coffee elsewhere or the narrow focus of a southern belle down yonder, we candidly talked about leaving it and our pursuits all behind.

But tonight... I wait.
I threw my hat into a ring. And someone that mattered picked it up.
And tomorrow, I learn how much longer New York will have me.

Can you make up your mind in this Circle Game?



Like Navin Johnson, I may have found my special purpose (at least for the 13th season) *

*The Jerk






Thursday, July 14, 2011

Ode to New York


Tompkins Square Park hosts another amazing night with free movies in the park and I sit slack jawed at the sheer genius of a 1979 Cult Classic and tribute to this fair, look how far we've come (or digressed), city.


*The showing did not incite any riots ...except for the leather vested long haired taking an overdue shower with his 40 oz.


Wednesday, July 13, 2011

"Woe to those who call evil good and good evil, who put darkness for light and light for darkness, who put bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter." Isaiah 5:20

Monday, July 11, 2011

The Human... Conditioned

"And the LORD God said, “The man has now become like one of us, knowing good and evil. He must not be allowed to reach out his hand and take also from the tree of life and eat, and live forever.”" Genesis 3:22

Somewhere between haggling with my fruit stand vendor over grape tomatoes and purchasing yet another copy of Elie Wiesel's Night for a dollar from the back of a catch-all tailgate....
It occurred to me as I smugly drank my freezing cold Kombucha on a hot Bowery corner, eyeing a homeless man soaking his feet in a bucket while reading the Daily News, that since my Monday's now consist of cheap psychotherapy where I wring my hands over suffering and loss to a subsidized septuagenarian then elbow up in a cramped classroom to other hopeful writers, critiquing one another's work and discussing the difference between a think piece novella and "Literary" as a separate genre all on its own, that without premeditated intent, I have become a walking New York City cliche.

Did you read it in one breath?

Saturday, July 9, 2011

A World Apart

"Because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."Philippians 1:5-6

No matter where I am.

"Cut off as I am, it is inevitable that I should sometimes feel like a shadow walking in a shadowy world. When this happens I ask to be taken to New York City. Always I return home weary but I have the comforting certainty that mankind is real and I myself am not a dream."
Helen Keller

If my soul weren't mine, living in my body, and seeing my reflection in the city's glass, I would stumble upon this blog and deem the writer indecisive and certifiably bi-polar.

The question of staying or going in this God forsaken and glorious city rears its troubling head far too many times for the author to have a stable grip on what she wants or needs.

Hemingway said New York is a place one comes for a short time, and in my brief stint I truly understand the dichotomy of placing love and hate on the same subject.

In truth, I find peace in my wavering.

"A hundred times have I thought New York is a catastrophe, and fifty times: It is a beautiful catastrophe." Le Corbusier

And the beauty of the chaos and contradictions can't be felt if you're not here.
The beaten brow drive, the unrelenting passion, the constant restlessness, and the energizing want just to be a part of it is intoxicating.
It sucks you in and spits you out, beckoning you to come back for more, whispering in your ear, there's no where else....

No, the desire to dance amongst the addicts in the fleeting seconds of bliss and bile is not to be understood by visitors or bystanders alike.
For those that live here; The struggle to stay afloat is shared.
And we fight tragically for this hard knock, delirious lifestyle.

“One belongs to New York instantly, one belongs to it as much in five minutes as in five years” Thomas Wolfe

And once it flows fast into your hard working, blood pumping veins, it's hard to escape it.

So is this my existence?

Friday, July 8, 2011

Justice

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."Isaiah 40:31

High Flight
Oh! I have slipped the surly bonds of Earth
And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings;
Sunward I've climbed, and joined the tumbling mirth
Of sun-split clouds, — and done a hundred things
You have not dreamed of — wheeled and soared and swung
High in the sunlit silence.
Hov'ring there,I've chased the shouting wind along, and flung
My eager craft through footless halls of air. . . .
Up, up the long, delirious burning blue
I've topped the wind-swept heights with easy grace
Where never lark, or ever eagle flew —And, while with silent, lifting mind I've trod
The high untrespassed sanctity of space,
Put out my hand, and touched the face of God.
John Gillespie Magee, Jr

Today marks the 135th and final flight for the Atlantis Space Shuttle. An evident testimony to our great nation. And the All Mighty Hand of God.

Now this is an occurrence in Florida worth talking about.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Pouring and Sporing

"For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse."Romans 1:20

I love New York: Reason 103

Escaping it feels so damn good...


Sunday, July 3, 2011

Bought For A Price

"Do not move an ancient boundary stone set up by your ancestors." Proverbs 22:28

"Why may not the Bible, and especially the New Testament be read and taught as a divine revelation in the school?
Where can the purest principles of morality be learned so clearly or so perfectly as from the New Testament?"
United States Supreme Court, 1844

The greatest country in the world, the United States America is doing just that...removing our cornerstone. And the crumbling has begun. The moral decay.

George Washington said it is impossible to govern without God and the Bible.
William Penn said if we aren't governed by God, we will be governed by tyrants.

Our current president celebrates Ramadan, quotes the Holy Quran, mocks the word of God, and shrugs off the National Day of Prayer. He says we are no longer a Christian nation.
John Adams said our Constitution was created for moral and holy citizens and the general principles in which our fathers achieved freedom was based on Christianity.
No wonder our current leaders want to amend the document.

The Mayflower Covenant began:
"In the name of God, Amen. We, whose names are underwritten, the Loyal Subjects of our dread Sovereign Lord, King James, by the Grace of God, of England, France and Ireland, King, Defender of the Faith, Having undertaken for the Glory of God, and Advancement of the Christian Faith, and the Honour of our King and Country, a voyage to plant the first colony in the northern parts of Virginia; do by these presents, solemnly and mutually in the Presence of God and one of another, covenant and combine ourselves together into a civil Body Politick. . .

President Andrew Jackson said "The Bible is the Rock on which this Republic rests." And WHY WE ARE SO BLESSED!!!

We have fallen away from these principles... And it shows.
Are we now paying for the removal of ancient landmarks set by our God fearing, freedom fighting, forefathers?