Cry Baby Cry

"Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe." Philippians 2:13-15

Disclaimer:

I am blessed beyond all measure.

I am living my life on my own terms as God's Will seems fit. I am nearing my 2nd year of abiding in the greatest, most vibrant city in the United States. I witness daily and experience often what so many can only envision. My life seems to be a series of peak experiences and my front yard an epicurean delight.

With all that said...

Al Pacino's Merchant of Venice, Shakespeare in the Park is closed for the season.

Did I sit under the stars amongst the fireflies for sheer genius and did I mention, free alfresco theater in one of the greatest parks in God's green Earth?

No.

John Legend sang about his love for the Lord as he passionately stroked the 66 keys of a Steinway piano and The Roots danced a funk for the masses.

Did I take my dark roast to go and shake free without abandon on this beautiful,breezy, fleeting summer Friday morning?

No.

Denzyl Washington gave another gut wrenching, Tony award winning performance in August Wilson's revival of Fences last night.

Did I stare with astonishment as he took his character to a dark and melancholy place in this famous racial melodrama?

No.

Isn't it obvious what I do?

I tie myself to a whipping post and bleed all over my keyboard.

Maybe I should just put the sugar on my tongue and run with it so the mundane seems like a psychedelic wonderland.

Do these people live more content lives?

A Portrait>>

My Neighbor

http://evgrieve.com/2010/08/looking-at-120-st-marks-place.html

In Good Faith

"Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God." Matthew 5:9

The latest confrontation at 8 AM this morning on an overflowing F Train...lady squealing at the two overweight men filling more than their share of seats. "I'm pregnant I have an excuse...you're just fat and stupid."

Today...three women sit on the Supreme Court.

I bury my face in New York Magazine and smile fondly at the words of my new found person of interest. Don't Hate>>

Oh Franti, take me away to a place of calm.

~Anywhere I go ’cause I was made of this earth
I'm born of this earth, I breathe of this earth
And even with the pain I believe in this earth...

So I wake up every mornin' and I'm steppin' on the floor.

I wake up every mornin' and I'm steppin' out the door.

I got faith in the sky, faith in the one
faith in the people rockin' underneath the sun.

Cause every bit of land is a holy land
and every drop of water is a holy water
and every single child is a son or a daughter.~ MF

The question is if we all claim to want peace... why do we kick and scream against it?

R-E-G-U-R-G-I-T-A-T-E

This is what the LORD says, he who made the earth, the LORD who formed it and established it the LORD is his name: 'Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.” Jeremiah 33:2-3

California is now a State of Married Bliss...Good for them.

And after they have gotten their way, reopened old childhoods wounds, discovered each others disgusting habits, strayed, and filled their hearts and lungs up with such resentment, they will let out a stifled scream and search for the fastest route to a divorce attorney.

How's marriage? Super, thanks for asking. Equal Rights my ass.

I'm sorry. It's not that I disagree. Commitment isn't unconstitutional but shoving your views deep down my throat evokes a gag reflux I can't contain.

While Bloomberg sings songs of religious freedom on Governor's Island, radical Islam gets a feather in their cap; 9/11 victims and Joe Public scream the thought provoking point of would we celebrate the Japanese building a shrine near Pearl Harbor?

Yes while I long to be the smiling long blond haired rosy cheeked girl spinning to a 20 minute jam of Gov't Mules Soulshine, the man on 5th Avenue threatening to bitch slap me has the loving me in a state.

So I do what I do when I don't like me...I fall to my knees.

It's all about You, Jesus
And all this is for You
For Your glory and your fame
It's not about me
As if You should do things my way
You alone are God
And I surrender to your ways...

Does any of this make me a hypocrite?

The Beginning of the End

"If you faint in the day of adversity, your strength is small." Proverbs 24:10

Couldn't find much scripture about self-deprecation so I look to Caddyshack.

"You're not, you're not good. You stink." Ty Webb

My AOL audition lasted all of 15 minutes...don't call us, we'll call you, again the sentiment.

Avoiding running off my extra tummy package worth of IPA Growlers..I catch up on some reading and feel compelled to share.

Missing the Point>>

Hitting the Mark>>

And

Running Hot Water Through Coffee Beans>>

My husband brought home a free "piece of art". Dela Vega spray painted Become Your Dream across an old 15" TV Monitor. He said it will inspire me.

I wonder.

How do you know when its time to turn it on or shut it off?

"In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps." Proverbs 16:9

List of things I'd like to see splendidly unfold tomorrow...I hope God is on the same page.

Book AOL commercial audition as a warm and sensible working mom...negotiate residuals.

Have the Genius at Apple Bar organize my Mac back to functional and slip me an iPAD for my frustrations.

Drop my dirty laundry with the Asians for my first time in Manhattan. I'm over self service.

Feel that stroke of inspiration (without illegal substance) to finally start first novel and put pen to paper.

Receive funding and fierce support from newly employed husband who shares good news over a bottle of Grand Krug.

Yep...I'm Taking a page from Cinderella that no matter how much my heart is grieving, I gotta keep on believing these dreams I wish will come true...

Is the moon and stars too much to ask for?

Unplugged

"But I have stilled and quieted my soul; like a weaned child with its mother, like a weaned child is my soul within me." Psalm 131:2

OHHHHhh!

MMMMMmm!

AAHHHHHhh!