Moments

"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God." Ephesians 6:10-17

This glorious night will forever be stamped on my heart.

It wasn't an unruly night of debaucheries and old girlfriend's gone wild.

But hours of honest fellowship with my 19 year old soldier in front of a warm fire, who gave me the verse from Ephesians to cease my watering eyes.

What if this time is the last time?

Chance

"For the sake of my family and friends, I will say, “Peace be within you.” Psalm 122:8

It took me having a very adult conversation with my nearly 35 year old self to come to this realization. I am not going to apologize to either of my parents about the mere mentioning of the others name. I will not worry if their paths cross or if I share a day's worth of fun with one and not the other. I am done listening to snide comments, 20 year old complaints and the pain of their failure.

I will not under any circumstances feel an ounce of guilt as to which side I'm spending on which Eve and what Day. Nor will I drive over the river and through the woods to make sure equal time is allotted the other 363.

Its high time for celebrating one rather large and extended family gathering (the gamble) or absolutely none at all (the safest bet one can make).

Guest List as follows:

The older entitled brother from my mother and an old lover; adopted by my unknowing future biological father.

Only later to have two much younger brothers from my father's second marriage and two stepsisters from the new wife's first.

Bring along an on again off again girlfriend of my father and her two less than willing equally touched by divorce teenagers.

Combine the drama with my mom's 12 year ex, his new wife, their surprise son, and the new Mr. Can't Do Wrong, Harley Davidson riding boyfriend and well this "Home for the Holidays" may be the beginning of the end.

So as I sit here amongst the aftermath...not a penny richer, not a penny poorer, I question myself. Is this a game I even want to play?

Do you know when to hold em and when to fold em?

The pain that comes with familial dysfunction is far too limiting.

I am constantly reminded of why I run...and grow while I'm far away.

I miss home...>>

Silent Night

"For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” Isaiah 9:6

A peaceful snowfall in the Georgia pines is a break from the normal rattle and constant hum.

The race for raucous nights and faint fame has been silenced.

The fallen Magnolias block the winter trails from the weight of their heavy white dusting. The cold spring barely murmurs over the mossy ice covered rocks. It's just me.

I find solace in the whisper, catch the coldness on my tongue, and stop.

Stop the running and the worrying. The determination to exist in a wild, wild world with eight million others. And listen to the seeking questions I usually muffle or drowned with distraction.

I raise my hands and fall back without hesitation in the quiet powder and stare at the vast Christmas night sky. I sing to the Lord of all creation Mary's song, to pour over me His Holiness. Be the Light in my darkness. For He alone is worthy. I'll give Him all the Glory. For He is heaven's Perfect Lamb born today to save the nations. He's Our Gracious King. So, Rejoice. Celebrate. And adore Him.

Christ Our Savior is Born.

Did you experience the true Christmas?

"She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.” Matthew 1:21

“Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.” Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, “Glory to God in the highest heaven, and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.” Luke 2:11-14

Hallelujah, he also brings good news...>>

This gives me hope for the "holy".

Now, I will drive even further south of the Mason Dixon line and find fodder for my book amongst my kin.

Why Bother if you Don't Believe?

Christmas can be a very difficult time to be in ministry. 

You may think, “How can that be? The season of celebration for Christ’s Advent should be the highlight of the year!” And you’re right. Every Christmas, God does amazing things in the lives of people that love Him, and for that we should all rejoice.

The difficult part, however, is that, in reality, there will be millions of people gathering in churches, hearing the truth of the Gospel, singing the carols of the faith, who will let the truth of Christmas go in one ear and out the other. That is difficult to watch because of what Christmas is. Christmas isn’t merely a nice story we tell every year. Christmas, in all its uniqueness and wonder, is God’s declaration of His only plan for the redemption and reconciliation of man to Himself. Christmas is God reinforcing the only way to salvation by sealing it with His miraculous signature.

There is no better example of that than the virgin birth. What purpose would cause God to bother with such intricate detail. The virgin birth is a central truth in the Christmas story because of its uniqueness. Only the virgin-born Savior is free from original sin, the hereditary condition of man passed from every father to every child since Father Adam.

Jesus was conceived by the Holy Spirit so that He was born perfect, as any sacrifice for our sin must be. His extraordinary life and ministry followed the pattern of his birth. He was born sinless through the virgin birth, and he lived a sinless life in the face of an Enemy who sought to destroy Him. He was born holy and pure, and He died as a falsely accused criminal who remained sinless and perfect. He was miraculously conceived, and He was miraculously resurrected. The virgin birth gave precedence to the power and glory of God that would be displayed throughout Jesus’ earthly ministry.

The unique truth of Christmas points to the unique truth of our redemption through Christ’s sacrifice. Why? Only a person, sinless from birth to death, can pay the penalty for sinners. Jesus was uniquely born for that purpose.Not only did God establish the power and trajectory for the work of His Son on earth with the miraculous work of Christmas, God also set apart Christianity from any other belief. You’ve heard people suggest, even demand, that Jesus is only one of many possible ways to God. The uniqueness of Jesus’ birth disallows such conclusions. In the Christ child, God was declaring to us that there is no other way.

There is no amount of good works, no degree of managing our evil desires, no hedging of bets that will provide the forgiveness of sins we so desperately need. Our hearts even cry out for the forgiveness for which we long. Our nature, however, wants to believe that we can provide our own forgiveness. Our nature wants to make its own path, its own rules, and its own belief system. Our nature doesn’t want to embrace truth. Our nature doesn’t want to believe Jesus is the only plan for humanity’s salvation. The purpose of the Advent of Christ tells us that our nature cannot be trusted. Our salvation is accomplished in like fashion as the Incarnation—by God’s design, for God’s glory, and for our good. If there were another way, there would be no Christmas. Jesus would not have had to leave His Father’s side in glory for the womb of a virgin. Because Jesus is the only way, Jesus came to us in obedience to His Father.

Because Jesus is the only way, He was born in miraculous power. Because Jesus is the only way, we have Christmas.When you read the Christmas story this year, bring a fresh perspective of the truth of Christ. God’s purpose is revealed in every detail, even down to the young girl that carried our Savior in her womb. God is telling us that salvation has come in authority and power. God is telling us that salvation has come, and it’s only through faith in Jesus, who is the Christ, our Savior.

Dr. Michael Youseff

Birthright

“And you, my child, will be called a prophet of the Most High; for you will go on before the Lord to prepare the way for him, to give his people the knowledge of salvation through the forgiveness of their sins, because of the tender mercy of our God, by which the rising sun will come to us from heaven” Luke 1:76-78

And put a rush on it because these guys aren't heeding the warning...>>

Have you caught yourself saying...hurry Lord come?

Ways to wind down after my debut performance at Upright Citizens Brigade...

Why this sounds simply lovely on a cold December Eve...>>

Instead, I'll be shaking my hot purple groove thing with a Prince..>>

Twas A Work Day

"And Mary said: “My soul glorifies the Lord and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for the Mighty One has done great things for me— holy is his name.” - Luke 1:46-47, 49

Flurries were falling as I sat at the bedroom window, swallowing the last lump of my tepid maple oatmeal. I stalled in putting on my fourth layer of down as the radiator was starting to spit... Fifteen degrees wind chill and a 7 AM, two train commute to the necessary evil J-O-B don't necessarily set my weary wheels in motion.

But Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus and today she was my employer.

And with the simple phrase, "Let's Play Hookie", so began the magical day where a jaded woman like me is swooped into a fantasy land of pure childhood glee.

A full cream gingerbread latte warmed my inside and the heated seats of car service warmed my back hide.

Now dash away all to Rockefeller Center where sleigh bells jingle and Kathy Lee and Hoda's plastic smiles twinkle.

Where Jolly men in red fat suits surround the glorious bright tree.

And the freezing violinist plucks O Holy Night on his vibrating strings.

Stand in the glow of St. Patrick's Cathedral by Fendi's dripping icicle lights.

Pick a Present at Bergdorf's then dine on truffle butter Lobster, overlooking the park's winter blight.

Henri Bendel Jewelry under the shining chandeliers...

Escape from swarming FAO Schwartz hell and the whining tears. AHHH!

Admire SAKS window dressings and $1800 Chanel shoes...

Eat Chocolate Ganache, Candied Ginger, Peppermint Icing, and whatever dessert I choose!!

Carriage rides up Central's Westside.

A beaming smile on my face.

Yes, enjoying holiday indulgence can be done with style and grace.

Hip Hip Hooray, let me sing and cheer.

And raise a bubbling glass for enduring this entire last year.

THANKS YH.

Amongst the giving and getting, and eating and greeting...

Will you remember the real reason for the season?

Yes! And....

"These are the things you are to do: Speak the truth to each other, and render true and sound judgment in your courts." Zechariah 8:16

Maturity is a bitter disappointment for which no remedy exists, unless laughter can be said to remedy anything. ~Kurt Vonnegut

"Yep, leave it to the prim and proper southern girl taking it to church or the gutter; works for her every time." Said an Improv classmate over discounted draughts with our student ID's.

Let me give three Amens for Improv Comedy bringing back honesty, political incorrectness, and me graduating from 101!

When you judge a book by its cover, how many times are you wrong?

**Now come see my show this Saturday, 5:30 at UCB

Rolling the Dice

“I have the right to do anything,” you say—but not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything”—but I will not be mastered by anything." 1 Corinthians 6:12

I've been heavily considering this quandary for the last few weeks. In order to become a better writer, I have to write and do so incessantly. In the same vein, in order to deepen my knowledge of prose, character development, story-telling and context, I have to read what's been written and a lot of it. Both of these pleasure principles eat up a considerable amount of my downtime.

But in order to truly hone my craft, I have to gather information in hours of research..So please excuse my leave of absence as the neon lights here started to dim and I had to go live and live wild....

It is for my book after all.

I'm gonna keep on the run
I'm gonna have me some fun
If it costs me my very last dime
If I wind up broke up well
I'll always remember that I had a swingin' time

Viva Las Vegas, Viva Las Vegas,
Viva, Viva Las Vegas...The King

Did you think I'd been kidnapped by the one arm bandits??

You were right.

My Muse

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.” John 15:5,8

Some unsuspecting member of my Improv Team made the glorious mistake of mentioning "religion rules" in their monologue which gave me endless material in each one of my politically incorrect and highly offensive sketches, making last night a praise-worthy power performance.

Yep, he still shines through the raucous and blaspheming comedienne in me and forgives my self-righteousness.

If God is everything, can't he be the punchline?

They lit it for the 8th night of Hanukkah.

But forgot Pearl Harbor.

I'm sorry I did too.

God Bless the Memory.

And John Lennon.

Purpose Driven

"This service that you perform is not only supplying the needs of the Lord’s people but is also overflowing in many expressions of thanks to God." 2 Corinthians 9:12

Another morning of reheated coffee and fiber filled cereal.

Another morning questioning my role on this roller coaster.

Options for work today are as follows:

1.Nude Photo Double for Andrew McCarthy.

2. Russian Mobster willing to brave wind on Brighton Beach Boardwalk.

Can't you feel them both just teeming with grand purpose and contribution?

Here's how the spin top selling man on the R train showed his worth:

"Waz wrong with ya people? Don't you be havin no manners? Idiots, get up off your asses, and give dis woman wit a baby yer seat. Dumb Asses wit no brains. You should be ashamed ofyerselves. Where de hell were ya'll raised? Idiot asses, let de woman sit."

Here's how The Bowery Mission spreads its worth:

Preaching the words of Jesus in Matthew saying, "Come unto me you who are weary and I will give you rest." while spooning out hot chocolate, chili and sandwich's to the line wrapped around the corner on the coldest day of the year.

Can you tell me which one of us is right?

Say goodbye to some of old New York...>>

Sadly more disappearances...>>

And the one frame that didn't get lost on the cutting room floor.

Silent Night

"And he said to them, “Come away by yourselves to a desolate place and rest a while.” For many were coming and going, and they had no leisure even to eat." Mark 6:31

...Deflated Improv Class Debacle. Husband's High School Reunion. One Too Many Irish Jigs. Mother In Law Marathon Visit. Canal Street Hustle. Sharp Freezing Wind. Hot Shattered Glass. And A Trio Hosted 2nd Annual Progressive (Drinking) Dinner Accomplished.

I've earned this Sunday.

Yes, there are days when I long to be invisible. To go about my walking rhythm unseen. And unsmiling. To only listen to silence and witness a nary. To not bump a shoulder, be asked for a dime, or divert my eyes from each passerby. To not look out my window and see naked bodies drinking milk at their fridge, young skaters building ramps outside my door, or delivery bikes feverishly pedaling the wrong way. But the purring streets of Manhattan don't lend that grace.

So to celebrate the official arrival of a flurried winter and shopping season, I will close my blinds tightly and make love to my bottle of Ronnybrook Farm Egg Nog in pure solace.

That is if the hot rod outside will quit dancing on his Harley's accelerator.

When is the last time you saw Peace on Earth...Goodwill to man?

*I miss my POLITICAL blog. It seemed less narcissistic.

Two Words

Though I would like to speak from the top of my intelligence, alas I fall so short.

Bourbon and Midtown is all I can utter this fine NY dawn.

You live longer once you realize that any time spent being unhappy is wasted. ~Ruth E. Renkl

Heaven's Recruiting in Harlem

"Salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given to mankind by which we must be saved.” Acts 4:12

No Secrets Here

"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God." John 1:1

It was the dripping wet, blustering chill in the air that thrust me into -This Little Piggy's- storefront. It was the five miles I ran with damp feet that made me order the roast beef with extra cheez whiz roll. But it was my obsession/sin about money that instigated a mind altering conversation with the owner.

The small walls covered in personalized dollar bills easily added up to a thousand notes and I felt a pining sensation in my empty belly. Sensing my hunger, he offered some sound advice about the Law of Attraction.

"What you speak becomes who you are."

I asked him what philosophy or religion he placed this notion.

"New Age." he replied. "If you think you will never have enough money, you would peel my wallpaper, you will always be without."

Humbled by the truth he saw by the doubt in me.

Strengthened by the fact that nothing about this practice is new...just another biblical principle I forget to pursue.

I left with a fistful of pastrami on the house and a positive smile on my lips singing gray skies are gonna clear up, put on a happy face.

"For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he." Proverbs 23:7

Truly I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, "Be taken up and cast into the sea," and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that what he says is going to happen, it shall be granted him. Therefore I say unto you, all things for which you pray and ask, believe that you have received them, and they shall be granted to you." Mark 11:23-24.

"The good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings out that which is good, and the evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart brings out that which is evil, for out of the abundance of the heart, his mouth speaks." Proverbs 6:45

"When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark." James 3:3-5

"Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. Whoever sows to please their flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; whoever sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." Galatians 6:7-9

Are you spreading sunshine?