Something about that Name

For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them. Matthew 18:20

When you hear the word church, you often associate it as a noun and being a structure or building for public Christian worship. My pastor in Atlanta, Michael Youseff refers to his two thousand plus congregation, Church. Not the fours walls and steeple but the people. I refer to church as being whenever and wherever I talk about the Lord to people. In fact just yesterday, me along with two unsuspecting actors braving the Brooklyn Bridge wind tunnel, came together with one name on our shivering lips. Jesus Christ. 

Now working as a background blur on popular television shows is nothing short of a fantastic trip. I say this with all sincerity. For one thing, variety. Its different every single day, you never know what location in which they're shooting, nor what church catacombs you will be held in (seriously, holding has been in four churches), or what personality you will be portraying. While you're making $100 a day, your in the same scenes with the stars making $450K an episode...

Secondly, a life of an extra is a bizarre underworld of the most dynamic, obnoxious, fascinating, talented, sub-par, disgraceful, and interesting characters you will ever find. From a 300 lb bald retired FDNY to an Hasidic Jew from Hoboken, the gang's all there.

 And you're stuck together for hours at a time, watching each other change wardrobes, set in scenes you are incessantly repeating.  Everyone is jumping their cues chasing the camera, on their feet for hours, praying for fame, and just trying to make a living. This is NOT under any circumstances for everyone. But for those of us who it is, WE thrive in it.

Standing between two gentleman in a City Hall courtyard portraying very important District Attorney's, I found two more believers in the Big Apple. The antithesis of one another. Preacher, a Jersey born raw in your face biker from Daytona to Sturges sporting a fu manchu preaching the word of the Lord to federal prisoners with a mouth like a sailor. He knows he' s saved by Grace. Michael, a charming clean cut tall drink of water southerner who has been in musical theater and performance as long as he can remember (including my favorite Opryland) also spoke of his strong faith in our Lord and Savior. There we were on camera revealing our hearts and discussing the power of Jesus in our lives,surrounded by the holy spirit. A non-secular Law and Order... I found this just astounding... and just another day at the office.

Somethin tells me
Its all happening at the zoo.

The monkeys stand for honesty,
Giraffes are insincere,
And the elephants are kindly but dumb.
Orangutans are skeptical
Of changes in their cages,
And the zookeeper is very fond of rum.. Simon and Garfunkel

Be it cage or cubicle, are you singing your song?

Pace Car?

"I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the LORD sustains me." Psalm 3:5

"I can't think about that right now. If I do, I'll go crazy. I'll think about that tomorrow." Scarlett O'Hara

I make no apologies for the brevity of this post. My eyes are burning from exhaustion and I'm chilled to the core. The bone crushing wind coming off the East River in Lower Manhattan and 12 hours on the set of Law and Order today has landed me in bed, belly full from Thai Angel delivery, and a burnt brain craving the mindless boob tube versus oh I don't know...functioning.

As always, a day on a TV set provides endless colorful content to fill the screen. But alas, in my current state of mind, I could not begin to do it's character's justice. It's not brain surgery, nor is it laborious labor, but the time commitment taxes the joints and takes the juice...

After limping home and cursing the director's broken record of 'reset once more',  I was greeted with four checks in the mail...so I'm going back for another round...

After all, tomorrow is another day!

If my work affects my work, which work should I relinquish?

 

Come One, Come All

"Is it not written: My house will be called a house of prayer for all nations? But you have made it a den on robbers." Mark 11:17

Here is my problem with organized religion. Marginalization.

When Jesus went into the temple that was segregated into two areas, one for the believing Jews (sacred) and the other, an outer Court of the Gentiles (not sacred) and saw the money exchangers and vendors all dominating with their business affairs,  he angrily condemns them and speaks those words.

A house of prayer for all nations...

Not a house of judgement, Not a house of ritual, not a house of condemnation, not a house of regulation. But a house of prayer for ALL nations.

I have NO idea what makes a Baptist, a Methodist, a Presbyterian, an Episcopal, a Latter Day Saints any different or above the next. I just know I believe in Jesus. And he's above them all.

Out of all of the churches I have visited since arriving in Manhattan, communion has been offered twice to the congregation.

This misty grey morning I visited The River Church in the financial district on lower Manhattan. The lead pastor Charles Park began the church four years ago after he received his PhD at MIT in Economics...Holy Brain!  He preached about "crossing the moat" from your castle and reaching out to others...

After an amazing bongo drum driven song and praise, he called us all to prayer and communion.

Christians observe communion because the Lord told us to. It is a time to remember what Christ did for us. A time to examine our walk. And a time to proclaim the Lord's name until He comes again.  It it Christ's table alone and ANYONE is welcome to come to it who has the desire to put Jesus in the center of their life. Let me say that again. Anyone. All nations.

Have you ever been to a house of worship and been told you can not take communion because you are not of that faith?

I have. Hence the marginalization. It's bullshit. 

More reason why my peers close up like rejected clams at the mention of church. 

Here me now and here me well...In all free countries, Vatican City as well, no man can deprive anyone of us by spending time with the Lord.

Standing firm in that one y'all.

 

Who is on the outskirts of your kingdom?

Me, Myself, and I

"If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls  and has no one to help him up!  Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone?" Ecclesiastes 4:10-11

One of my dearest friends called me from San Francisco today as I was sitting on a park bench watching Tim Robbins play street hockey on this mellow Saturday afternoon...
Since she moved from Atlanta to SF, we've been pretty consistent on our Saturday calls. Sometimes once a week, sometimes once a month, but always keeping the connection warm between  the two coasts.

We talked about our life choices. The last 12 years. She commended me for my move here but asked me if I ever get lonely? Surrounded by hundreds of shopping back toter's in SOHO, immediately my knee jerk response was a resounding no! I'm a loner. I relish my quiet time. I enjoy being inside my head... But walking alone on this first breath of spring gave me a serious case of the downright blues.

 The Indigo Girls wrote a song called, "Something about the Southland in the Springtime". Where there is nothing more pleasing than azaleas, redbuds, Bradford pears, and cherry blossoms filling the air and making winter a mere memory. It is without a doubt the best and the briefest season in Georgia. A couple pleasant days find everyone in desperate search for the perfect patio to kick back a few and soak up the sun, days later we're running in desperation to anywhere inside closed doors and air-conditioned...
In New York, Spring is for lovers... spent outdoors and lingering  from cool March to sultry late June.
Every single restaurant that has sidewalk space is erecting outdoor tables and groups are flocking to the lack of elbow room still in their down jackets, tilting mimosas, turning over finished wine bottles, laughing, touching, kissing,  fellow shipping. Brunch runs until 4 PM in Manhattan where revelers are deep into their glorious and (enviable) bacchanalia.

Today, I'm lonesome.  I miss my husband. I'm craving my girlfriends. Today NY is BIG.

You got to have friends.
The feeling's oh so strong.
You got to have friends
to make that day last long. B. Midler

To Drink or not Drink Alone, that is the question?

Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish

 "Everything in the heavens and earth is yours, O Lord, and this is your kingdom.  We adore you as being in control of everything.  Riches and honor come from you alone, and you are the Ruler of all mankind; your hand controls power and might and it is at your discretion that men are made great and given strength" 1 Chronicles 29-11-12 

Friday has arrived and I am taking the next two days off before I am a featured DA on the mother ship Law and Order on a fast approaching chipper Monday morning..

College dropout and CEO of Apple Computer and Pixar Animation, Steve Jobs spoke these poignant words in a commencement address to Stanford University graduates:

"You've got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. So keep looking until you find it. Don't settle."

What on Earth am I doing? Lately there are days when I wonder if I have already taken my eye off the prize or if I'm just sliding though every single cracked window I spy...knowing the baby steps will ultimately lead to that dream job. That fulfillment. 

 In the attempt to keep making rent every month, I am exhausting myself by going after the necessary but it may be the necessary frivolous.

 You know what, shame on me. forget I wrote that.... Upon further self examination and admittance this 'career path' is what I have sought after my entire life. 

I call it my Heavenly Father's plan and others call it intuition but if you listen to it and have the courage to follow it, it's going to guide you through a winding road to exactly who and what you are supposed to become.

Let me take a moment while I see my life flash before my eyes..

Perched in my Tropicana hoodie on my brown pit couch portraying MTV VJ Martha Quinn in front of a camcorder interviewing heavy rockers. Staring into my bedroom dresser mirror while a sold out arena of adoring fans looked back at my best song and dance Steve Perry impersonation...Barbie's career, one act plays with Epiphany Theater, Album 88 college radio, and years later in my adamant pursuit of a now eight year career in television journalism, I have always rested on a vague aspiration of FAME.  

I want to write. I want to dance. I want to sing. I want to live. I want to be know doing it. 

In other words, I'm not settling.

"Don't stop believin, hold on to that feelin." Journey

Your day's are numbered. How many are you spending living someone else's life?

Showbiz..zzzzz

"May the favor of the Lord our God rest upon us; establish the work of our hands for us— yes, establish the work of our hands."Psalm 90:17

I know I keep threatening to make this daily dribble find its way to a now and then rant but here I am at one in the morning, trying to make sense of my myriad of thoughts throughout the day into two paragraphs of worthy content at the end of a very long work and play. There is so much I would like to convey. Oy! Apparently I need to see a series called Extra's, although I am living it these days. I liken the mad experience of background to train traveling in very close quarters learning the most intimate details of individuals in a short amount of time.

 Oh if the personality traits I encounter could only manifest themselves into a complicated little short story I created...  Until then I am taking notes...Caught a bus early this rainy morning through the Lincoln Tunnel to New Jersey this for some oh so serious face time as a journalist on Law and Order. I wish I had a couple ten year old nieces to call up and scream my shrill cheerleader voice, Oh my God girls, I met Hilarie Duff today...but alas...I'm sharing it in black and white and without spirit fingers. I did get to share in Mariska's ripe avocado and Meloni's stout shoulders...(Extra Insider Joke)

Between my entire week on television/film sets, my husband's whirlwind of a visit, and the nightlife fried boogie I've been shaking, I'm due for a delicious nine hours of sleep night, slow coffee in the AM, oh yeah and spring time. I'm ready to see the rest of NYC come out of hibernation.

Beat?

 

Allure in a Bottle

The king is enthralled by your beauty;  honor him, for he is your lord" Psalm 45:11

" What I am is what I am. Are you what you are or what?" Edie Brikell

Last night a girlfriend told me that she was amazed that I am doing all of these odd jobs and throwing my hat into the circus ring called dabbling all for the sake of living in Manhattan.   I may be wearing plenty of top hats but without letting any kind of halo slip down and choke me, I have to say I am really only pursuing vocations in which I have more than a shred of interest in. That is, until today. 

 I took the E train this morning into Long Island City, Queens for a luxury skin care line training session to be a "mini" doctor for needing patients at Barney's Department Store...Not knowing that the indoctrination would go longer than 2 1/2 hours I had to slip out at the tail end before the tour of the industrial laboratory. However, sitting in front of gargantuan engineered muffins at the start of the morning, discussing the molecular bio cellular life altering nano complexes all in a simple jar of creme, I quickly realized I will never be a Cosmetic Counter Girl...but I knew that already.   Sure I would adore clear skin, I would appreciate looking younger than my age,(someone told me I could easily be a stand-in for Jennifer Anniston but I'm older than her...EEEK) or would enjoy learning how to reverse any damage I've done soaking up my more than ample doses of Vitamin D, but I am not a hustler and I know myself well enough to grasp that lacking quality.  I can not throw my 100% behind a beauty product and tell other human beings that a cleansing activator will heal their burdens or vanquish their sorrows.
No discredit to the passionate woman behind the innovative product or her thriving business. She is good at what she does. At WHAT SHE DOES. She is helping people feel better about themselves, she is on a mission to change people's minds about surgery/injection induced images. She Actually said these words, "I lost a friend to anti-aging. He was gay and fabulous and now he's dead." Others in the meeting chimed in that they also have had illegal silicon shot into their face. Oh Lord, This is not my world....As all the other beauty and health experts were taking a smoke break...I was handed a goodie back of samples to prove their "our product works theory".   

So get this mental picture, I'm hunkering down in my pj's with a crushed Xanax on my stress blister, icing the bunion, and applying the mask.
Isn't Beauty found in the eye of the beholder?

Mmm Smorgasbord Good

Every valley shall be filled in, every mountain and hill made low.  The crooked roads shall become straight,  the rough ways smooth. And all mankind will see God's Salvation." Luke 3:5-6

Growing up in the south, of course I heard the word and witnessed to some degree, the separation of races and ethnicity's as a form of discrimination or exclusivity. It was often black and white. And frequently not by elect.

 Never before in my life have I experienced it by such grand choice as exhibited here.

Residential and Restaurant Segregation. That is truly symbolic of NY. Between Chinatown, Little Italy,(obvious)  K-Town,( Korean) Flushing, Hell's Kitchen, Murray Hill (recent college grads), Chelsea (gay), the list goes on and on. The neighborhoods are defined by the lifestyle. Say if you live on the Upper West, you're a young family. Puerto Ricans dwell  in Spanish Harlem.

 Now before you tell me I am judging, this is what patrons of this neighborhood are telling me. In fact, an NY born and bred told me today, if I want to see diversity take the 7 train through five different ethnic groups between 5 different stops, I'll see Filipino Barbecue to Dominican, Romanian, German and Indian fare all for a $2 ride... One third of this city's population is foreign born!!

No, I am not going John Rocker on any of you. This absolutely gorgeous, diverse, melting pot of cultures and cuisines is what makes this city beautifully hypnotic. I'm in a food coma trance. And I'm soaking it to full capacity.

I met my old neighbor in the East Village for dinner tonight. She was raised in Queens and lives in Atlanta now. She recommended a restaurant whose motto is "Ramen is the Soul Food of NYC", an authentic noodle place called Ippudo. I arrived at 6:50 to a wall to wall happy hour crowd of for the most part, Japanese. My girlfriend told me she would meet me at the bar, despite the four deep crowd, I decided not too worry..I was the only blue eyed, blond in the room.

As a foodie, I put another tally in the love NY box. But as a lover of all mankind, I am in Hog Heaven...

"Coffee black and egg white

Pull me out from inside.

i am ready, i am fine." Counting Crows

Are you color blind?

Assimilation Woes

"A fool's lips bring him strife, and his mouth invites a beating." Proverbs 18:6

Remember the childhood rhyme, stick and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me? This sing song has absolutely no validity when it comes to intimate relationships. 

The tongue is like a tiny rudder steering the strongest of ships. And it is up to the captain to steer against the powerful wind or into the destructive rocks. 

Or like the old adage of hammering a square peg into a round hole..no matter how hard you bang or how fast you swing, it's never going to fit. You will only change the natural God given position of that shape.  How about force feeding a baby, often times the result is a violent spitting of the food back into your face and zero harmony between mommy and me.

It is a heart wrenching realization that no matter what action you take it will have no bearing on another person's behavior. You can bring the country boy to the big city but you can't make them meld...

As children of God, we are supposed to conform to God's image. Change. Repent. Convert. Our lives should imitate and manifest the life of Christ. THIS IS EXTREMELY DIFFICULT!

And while iron sharpens iron, there comes a point where the constant struggle of swimming upstream is out of place especially if you're not a salmon. 

And I find myself red in the face singing, I love you, you're perfect, now change!

It's the fat guy in a little coat syndrome.

Can you hear the threads tearing?

 

Sunday

"So the people rested on the seventh day."

Exodus 16:30

Monotony

"The kingdom of heaven is like a king who prepared a wedding banquet for his son." Matthew 22:2

Two months and counting...When I first started talking about living in Manhattan in my early 20's, my ideal commitment time was 2-3 years.  Then as time marched on and life got in the way, I had shaved it down to a mere, I'll live in NYC for one year. And just last year when I sat across from my husband and said. New York is not going away, it keeps rearing its head....I need just 3 months to scratch my insatiable itch . Tomorrow I'm entering my third month and I've only just begun to scrape the surface of it's skin.  What was I thinking? 

When you're visiting this city, your days consist of walking from one eatery destination to the next. Your schedule revolves around your appetite and your business around your reservation times. You don't truly experience the energy or the culture. Nor, do you grasp the wild adventure of schlepping your groceries on your shoulders ten blocks home at rush hour after a twelve hour workday.

 With that being said, I would much rather live in New York than visit... 

Despite the ample walking that occurs as a visitor, when you're eating greasy buffalo mozzarella Lombardi's Pizza, Chelsea Thai fish noodles, Delicatessen's crispy fish and chips and bacon sliders, and Balthazar's creamy chocolate anglaise washing it all down with stiff mojitos in one day, at some point the vacation has to cease and a routine must settle in.  

I love my husband visiting but it's high time he lived here too...

I'm damn near satiated.

Do you follow me?

Matter over Mind

"They were glad when it grew calm, and he guided them to their desired haven." Psalm 107:30

I don't want to lapse..but days and nights like these, it is impossible to sit and be self reflective. Patrick is here and my focus is to show him the passion I feel for this city so the passion he feels for me will transpire itself in a life here..

And the life we want, the family we pray for, the dream we seek, will find us here....42nd to Hudson, Broadway to Greenwich, we're walking hand in hand. We've got high hopes. And now we'll relish the togetherness and the reconditioning. Alone.

Absence is to love as wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small and kindles the great.

Roger de Bussy-Rabutin

Have you ever sacrificed for love?

Fight the Good Fight

"As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the LORD is flawless. He is a shield for all who take refuge in him" 2 Samuel 22:31

I met a young Canadian boy the summer of 1998 smack dab in the middle of our freshman/sophomore year of college in the lobby of university dormitory at midnight in intoxicating Prague, Czech Republic. I was coming in from a long train from Munich and he a night out in Old Towne. We had an instant connection. Spent a fantastic summer in Europe in an absinthe/hash daze stumbling over cobblestones laid in the 1300's. I shared with him my faith in the Lord, he told me of his adamant rejection of religion. 

We were raised polar opposites and disagreed on plenty. If anything, we were consistent.

Fast forward eleven years, our written correspondence has had a chance to bloom with recent reunions here in New York.  We genuinely love and respect each other and still to this day are consistent in our stance, both nudging each other to come on over to each other's side.

This most dear non-believing fantastic friend of mine sent me an interview today with scholar Bart Ehrman on NPR.  He's written a book about the early scribes who through misinterpretation and some intention,  changed the Bible and in theory the Lord's true words.  In translation if things were theologically questionable or hard to swallow, they tweaked it so the layman could understand. Which of course begs the question why the didn't omit the lambs opening the seven seals but added stories of just and righteous judgement. Who is this guy to say Jesus is misquoted...?

At any rate, this argument that Ehrman formed his whole book on is without a doubt absolutely feasible. Does it change who HE is?   Not in the slightest.  This is where I have a problem. Why is everyone trying to negate the Word of God? Everyone is trying to prove the Christian faith wrong or deem us misinformed...for what a feather in your cap?

I have news for you, is you are basing ANY of your beliefs on what MAN is telling you, you probably are WRONG!

 I don't believe that you can necessarily become a Christian by reading the Bible, nor can you find your tangible proof of God in words from Genesis to Revelation.

Hence Faith: (noun) A belief that does not rest on logical proof or material evidence.

But to ask the Lord into your heart, to feel the Holy Spirit working inside you, to walk without fear knowing His hand is on you. To experience His Grace. To seek Him and to know Him and devise your guidance through a relationship with the Lord has nothing to do with the fact that the ancient day scribes changed a word or two.  

Walking with Jesus is my portion. The Bible is my 2nd helping of crusty bread and drenching water.   

The debate is between You and Him. Not you and me.

What keeps you running?

It's Time to Shine

"I have seen something else under the sun: The race is not to the swift or the battle to the strong, nor does food come to the wise or wealth to the brilliant or favor to the learned; but time and chance happen to them all." Ecclesiastes 9:11

Time and Chance. To All.  I love that about God's plan.

Come to me my melancholy baby, cuddle up and don't be blue..all of your fears are foolish fancies baby...B. Crosby

Settling in to the kickstart of my weekend (on Wednesday) with a healthy glass of Cabernet and the sounds of Ella Fitzgerald oozing me into that low relaxation mode.Spending the last five days as background on television sets has been thoroughly exciting, fairly lucrative, and decent grubbing. However, it definitely zaps my mojo..Today was errand day. My husband is coming to New York City tomorrow and I'm proverbially rolling out the red carpet which is not really necessarily here. The city is gift enough.  You either feel it or you don't..Met a woman from Alabama yesterday who has been here for 16 years...still with a honey southern drawl she explained to me that New York was built on a geographic rock structure that generates electricity and energy. It charges you while you're here and when you leave you become depleted. She went on to say she occasionally will venture away from New York but scares herself as she thinks she might die from boredom and often cuts her vacations away short. But she still sure is cold here....

The average temperature for NY in March is 50 degrees and the low 34.  Today was a flawless deep blue sky with a radiant sun warming these concrete walls to a snug 63 degrees. And you would have thought we were on the riviera. Pasty white skin was revealed in more ways than I can count. Brown bag lunches sprawled on the steps of the Met, the lines at Union Square farmer's Market were 10 deep, restaurant doors thrown open for patrons craving alfresco dining. Looks like New Yorker's have been fervidly anticipating spring...their out of their apartments by the droveful.Me in my usual black down jacket rushed from deli to street vendor snagging two dozen roses for $10, low brow white wine for a good time, and  the best $1 fresh falafel you can buy...by the time I lugged my goods to the TRIangle BElow CAnal...I was in a full blown sweat.If I love this city in the winter, I feel obsession approaching with spring.

"Springtime is on my mind
Flowers blooming, all the time
Smell the roses
Smell the grass
Old man winter can kiss my ass" Spinal Tap

Have you had your time in the sun?

Little Fame

"But the meek will inherit the land and enjoy great peace." Psalm 37:11

"Last Looks everyone...if you're doing a close up of Blake, I've got to get in there." hair & makeup

Considering all the last looks on our Gossip Gals and an fire alarm evacuation from set, a five minute scene made the creep to 13 hour shoot in Brooklyn Heights...

My St. Patrick's Day (Irish by marriage) began on the R Train at 7:30 this morning,my arms filled with Nancy Reganesque clothing and my car filled with burly wide shouldered lads who had already commenced the cajoling; a wee sexy I might add.  And ended shortly before midnight where I slept walked into my Irish Masshole friends open door to chilled Tullamore Dew and Corned Beef and Cabbage overlooking the radiant and rather green Empire State Building. Just gorgeous!

The in between was where the magic happened..or so the saying goes.

 Being on set  has an amazing undeniable energy you can not experience at alternative jobs...getting checked through wardrobe, bathing in the lights, listening for the Art Director's commands, networking with the most curious and interesting of characters (met a woman who writes about burlesque) But mostly, it is watching the stars up close and in their element. It is true entertainment.

I have never seen Gossip Girl so I can not speak of the younger stars...

Here is who had my attention.

Wallace Shawn. You might not recognize his name, but there is no mistaking his face or that voice...Some of my favorite works include his first role in Manhattan( in which Allen calls him homunculus), the inept kidnapper from Princess Bride, Mr. Hall from Clueless, and Rex the Dinosaur in Toy Story.

 You got the picture?  Yes, he's an actor. More so an honored playwright, but most importantly he is the son of the famed editor of the New Yorker magazine, William Shawn, who reigned for over three decades. A literary genius upbringing and an Ivy league intelligence, all wrapped up in a little true New Yorker bundle bringing some serious culture to the otherwise vacuous world of an upper East Side teenager. And he didn't call for countless makeup touches between takes...

Honestly, I had to pinch myself all day. Not for not wearing the color of the Shamrock, but because I can't can't believe my luck.  Did I mention I'll be featured on the finale?

Where are you searching for your pot o'gold?

Enough's Enough

"Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." Thessalonians 5:18

"But they didn't figure, What my wit's as quick as a hair trigger . He's not your everyday-type Prankster. He's Ice-T, the original gangster." Unfortunately I did not get close enough to Ice-T this morning to let him know the soundtrack to my 8th grade year was that very album.  I'm quite sure he would have been impressed...S.V.U baby! 

Held in the catacombs of  St. John Divine on Cathedral Parkway and fed a barbecue lunch to make a Georgia girl proud, I'm adding Law And Order to my credits! Just another trench coat in the New York streets.

 Y'all I am tired. And when I'm tired. My i's are long and drawn out like a sticky syrupy molasses and my eyes lose their shine. This is no good as I've been casted on New York shows for the next three days...criteria, Bright eyed and No accent. And gasp, I've reached the ripe parental age. I am an upper west side mom of a Gossip Girl graduate...Bring on the pastel sweater sets and pearls!  The last two casting calls that came through, I absolutely resisted but after talking to a gentleman today about his blessings that have come  from God Alone, why would I push away the opportunity? 

A now SAG member with a remarkable star studded resume, he told me he prayed and followed God's will every step of the way...Shame on me. I'm getting work while 1 out of every 4 I meet on set are there because of layoffs. Not silver screen dreams.

Moment of Truth:

I'm nodding out.

With the impending danger of this blog become purely narcissistic and highly unidentifiable to my readers I am taking a step back to recuperate. Quality is so much more enticing than quantity. And as I am tackling more jobs and longer hours, my creativity and insight are getting lost in the lack of sleep.  And I don't want to lose your faith.

Will you still need me, Will you still read me?

A Transplant

"If the home is deserving, let your peace rest on it; if it is not, let your peace return to you." Matthew 10:13

...the true New Yorker's secret belief that people living anywhere else had to be, in some sense, kidding.  John Updike

We have an overabundance of talking heads droning on about the security of America's T-notes, the safety of our people that Obama is risking, and Pakistan being an unruly nuclear bearing state, Washington is having to keep an eye on..If I wasn't so blessed to be an American, all of the negative focus could have put a damper on my Sunday morning.

This is a great city, but an even better country.

This summer at gas prices peak, my husband and I loaded up our vehicle with a tent fit for two, an igloo cooler, hiking shoes, and plenty of wide open road music. We drove 7,000 miles across the gorgeous roads of our great nation, the United States of America, taking every two line highway and scenic byway that came our way. A part of us went in search of a new home. To be inspired. To find something other than the life we were living. But mostly, to embrace another adventure. 

We journeyed through whiskey stills and Redwoods, down the Pacific Coast Highway and up into The magnificent Rockies. We stayed with my uncle who's made his home in the crazy mountains of Montana for the last 40 years. Visited with my brother-in-law who set up shop and made a family in Minneapolis. Slept on 104 degree rocks in the Mojave Desert. Meandered on an abandoned and revived Route 66 with history screaming from the cracked asphalt.  On the outskirts of the Grand Tetons of Wyoming to the eight lane sprawl surrounding Los Angeles many are dropping their anchors, investing their hearts, and building  lives around their towns. 

 Some spread their wings and fly, some never set sail.  It takes all kinds.

I admire the contentment people feel in keeping their feet planted. I don't relate.

I'm the former. Always looking for another hook to hang my hat...Atlanta has been my home base for 23 years. But I've left "home" all the while, lived in an old communist dorm in Prague, a converted tool shed in St. John, a three bedroom college flat in Australia, had beautiful views, stared at stucco walls, endured crazy roommate antics, carried my possessions in my old Trooper, and cooked in kitchens every shape, size and cleanliness. 

Never leaving my roots in the soil, all in the spirit of another peak experience.

New York City is just that, a dose of paper on my tongue that is opening doors and providing new fodder in this condition we call reality.

Everyday I am meeting more people who picked up to come here for a career challenge, a unique opportunity, a frightening endeavor, a lifelong aspiration, a new shade of green. 

I don't believe that home has to be where you were born, where your parent's live, a four wall room filled with material possessions.

Home is where the heart is. And right now. New York is my town.

"Main Street isn't main street anymore.

No one seems to need us like they did before." JT

Is it hard to find a reason left to stay?

No Words from the Weary

In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat for he grants sleep to those he loves." Psalm 127:2

Boarded the 6 Train at 4:45AM this morning and was not alone. Hair and Makeup camera ready drinking my stiff coffee after four hours of sleep, I was amongst Friday night club revelers taking the long ride home and still discussing the DJ's old school sounds...NO SLEEP TIL BROOKLYN.

After wading through the sea of extra's and a steaming hot breakfast line that wrapped around the corner, places were set for a day of madness. A day of Exteriors.

 Stood on Park Avenue next to the Waldorf Astoria in front of the breathtaking St. Bartholomew's Church for twelve hours and watched the sun rise and set over the set of Salt. As the paparazzi created the mass hysteria of  an Angelina frenzy and Liev held his beautiful blonde baby between takes, the NYPD bagpipe music put us all in the mourning spirit....

One partial scene in the can. 12 hours of work on my time card. I'm zonked.

Rolling, Action, Cut, Wrap, Home, Hallelujah!

Foot on the pedal - never ever false metal
Engine running hotter than a boiling kettle
My job's ain't a job - it's a damn good time

No sleep til'

Are you rockin the party eight days a week?

 

Two Way Street

"So in everything, do unto others, as you would have them do to you, for this sums up all the Law and Prophets." Matthew 7:12

We have all heard often and put into practice sometimes,  The Golden Rule. Such a concept to strive for and what so many people say they want. A novel idea. But here on Earth, the common translation seems to read...He who has all the Gold makes all the Rules.

This applies itself quite well in the Land of Plenty.

There are people with the disposable income and those of us who work for them. 

Case in point, in the short time I have been here I have gained the trust of a gold holder.  This is an extreme compliment to me as I've stated before; Honesty is a characteristic I would like to have follow my spoken name. After counting piles of paper money and relaying how much extraneous cash he actually had laying around, the interesting work proposition followed. While I am not skilled in the profession, rate dealing is quickly becoming one of my keener traits.   Hand to mouth people.... Job number 5 is it?

In the meantime,

It's Hi diddly Dee an Actor's Life for me. Filled out a payment voucher today for Columbia Pictures...Another Gold Holder.  They casted me as an extra on my first feature film. It is an espionage thriller called Salt starring Angelina Jolie and Liev Schrieber...oooh I already have stars in my eyes..... Today was the wardrobe approval meeting for the film, all of thirty minutes and I got payed $11 per 10 minute increments...not too shabby.  This thing we call show business might be right up my alley...(drawback 5:15 AM Set call tomorrow)

Truly, I am feeling overwhelmingly blessed at this point. Appreciative of all of the opportunities that are coming my way. Thrilled to be generating revenue. I can most certainly be a yes girl employee...but there's a catch.  

What am I creating? What is truly mine? Am I just working for and towards another's dream?

Where's the reciprocity in your life?

Super! Thanks for Asking

"Be happy, young man, while you are young, and let your heart give you joy in the days of your youth. Follow the ways of your heart and whatever your eyes see, but know that for all these things God will bring you to judgment" Ecclesiastes 11:9

These vagabond shoes are longing to stray, right through the very heart of it. The little town blues are melting away, I'm gonna make a brand new start of it...

The blue-eyed crooner and I caught the same spirit

Forty Eight Hours of solid hustle work...From catering to playlists, candle lighting to publicists, cashmere cardigans to plaid pashmina, I've been up to my elbows in a world of Fashion Entertainment.  For something as material as launching the new Fall 2009 Denim line may be...a lot of blood, sweat, tears, heart, and money sure do get poured into such an event.( I can't believe the 80's are back)

 Significant or meaningless, it is happening and alive and well in the city that never sleeps. After the magazine editors had come and gone, food passed, booze devoured, mannequins undressed ( a lot quicker this time) and we had burned though the glamour, glitz, and green (figuratively and literally), I relished in the end of a magical night surrounded by blue spruce watching the moon rise as the clouds rolled back and revealed shining stars over Manhattan's glorious right angles...This place is addictive! 

I believe there are two sorts of people, those that can live in New York City and those who can not. Those who adore musical theater and can sing it no matter their level of exhaustion and those that do not. I'm not sure there is a gray area...

As I was funneling V2 Energy Vodka( caffeine and taurine) into bottles five stories high on the roof overlooking the Flatiron Building, I made eye contact with the faces chained to the desks in the building next door. I wondered what was is it about New York that keeps them here. Is it the same energy that has captured me and made me long to be here the better part of my 20's?   Was this destination their dream as well? How many people in their lives are waiting for them to get New York out of their system.

Word to the wise..

Quit asking me how long I am staying. I don't know.

Cease the discussions about settling down. I might not.

No more inquires on pregnancy and childbirth. You'll know when I'm ready.

Gone are the remarks about my career. I define it as living.

New line of questioning...

ARE YOU HAPPY?

Girl Interrupted

"Do you not know? Have you not heard?  The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary,  and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak." Isaiah 40:28-29

Oh for me, the continual duration has reached it's maximum capacity.

I knew this would eventually happen, no writing tonight...it's sleepy time y'all.

Full up?

Sincere and Stable

"When I came to you, brothers, I did not come with eloquence or superior wisdom as I proclaimed to you the testimony about God." 1 Corinthians 2:1

After spending 13 hours transforming a  gorgeous flat on 5th Avenue into a fashion showroom, wrestling to get size 25 jeans on mannequins for a good portion of the day, and toasting the clients on a job well done...I'm home and quite frankly experiencing intense writer's block.

So I will keep it sweet and solid.

My absolute favorite and most refreshing aspect of  New Yorkers is, they keep it real. I know I've written about this before but the truth is so much easier to swallow than any delicate white lie said straight to my face or behind my back. From money, appearance, ridicule, opinions, preferences, and lifestyles...what southerners often think but rarely voice, they say it loud and they say it proud. I heard Oprah Winfrey say once that when she turned 40 years old, she quit caring what others thought of her.

 In Manhattan, that condition has a premature onset.

Again, I take such comfort in this as it takes the guesswork out of an acquaintance.  

This absoluteness makes talking about the Lord even easier for me. Not because people give me the benefit of the doubt, quite the contrary.  Often they adamantly disagree, call me crazy, say I'm brainwashed and naive, and I've got to be joking???

 Tolerance seems to go out the window.

 Today a new friend told me he doesn't believe in God, but believes in good. How could I believe Jesus was the son of God? Mary was actually raped my a Roman soldier and the good man Joseph saved her from a flogging. With the same certainty he went on to say Christians believe they are superior to everyone else...

If that is a genuine experience, I'm sorry I have failed in that respect because humility and acceptance are my commands.  I can argue my case, talk just as loud as the next, or be a living example but my best recourse in defense are God's breathed words..

"Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love."

"He mocks proud mockers but gives grace to the humble."
"For whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted." 

Here's the deal... Hear my words. I don't expect you to heed them. 

I'll attend to your beliefs. But don't expect me to adopt them.

Ain't freedom of choice a beautiful thing?

Tastes Better Too

"Salt is good, but if it loses its saltiness, how can you make it salty again? Have salt in yourselves, and be at peace with each other." Mark 9:50

You know the omniscient all knowing THEY? Well, they say variety is the spice of life..

In the last several days, I auditioned for a supporting role as a Stepford Wife type for an Indy film, met two transgenders, was blatantly denied drinks at a gay bar, cordially invited to a Porn and Pancakes weekend at a city church, sat through an intense 90 minutes of Thelma and Louise meets Kill Bill production appropriately called The Rape Play (deserves it's own post), listened to an overdone woman make an ASAP appointment to get fat from her buttocks shot into her already plump cheeks, overheard my roommate having a serious romp session in our living room, wrote two articles for the NY Examiner for cash, got back in contact with Scholastic Publishing during a teacher's protest weekend, discovered a guest speaker at a church plagiarized his entire monologue, celebrated a blessed birthday, gave a theatrical performance of Morales' Nothing from The Chorus Line, interviewed with a skincare Rep at Barney's, reunited with a dear 13 year old boy who I babysat all through college, ate bone marrow and butter spread on a toast point, was payed to be a personal assistant and grocery shop, walked through Times Square on a clear 50 degree night (Yikes), danced my butt off on a rooftop bar, started freelance work for a stylist consultant for a denim line (samples), ran three miles along the Hudson, took a lucrative secret shopper job which is acting practice, visited three preschools, had hot husband and wife relations on the phone (in person is first preference), witnessed a mob boss give his testimony to Jesus Christ, said yes to every Law and Order extra job that came into view, pushed two wardrobe racks five blocks down Broadway, and drafted my intro article to Blogger Bee in NYC....Tomorrow, I am a mixologist for a fashion publicity event and creative production assistant for the line's party on Wednesday on 5th Avenue. Only in this city y'all!

I may be blonde and speak with a southern drawl but you can't typecast me.

Are you saying it's Time to Make the Doughnuts again?

He's a Good Fella

"When a man's ways are pleasing to the LORD,   he makes even his enemies live at peace with him." Proverbs 16:7

Oh man, am I glad I went to church today. At Journey Church today on 34th Street, I received a double dose of entertainment. Worshiping the Lord and a heaping portion of a gangster flick.

You've heard of jailhouse conversions? Well today's testimony gives new meaning to that phrase.   The guest speaker today went through two born again experiences but the second one saved his life.   Michael Franzese grew up as the son of the notorious underboss of New York's Columbo Crime Family.  After his father was indicted in the 60's and sent to Leavenworth Prison to serve out a 50 year sentence, Franzese chose to follow his dad and took an oath on Halloween night 1975  with six others as a Made man he was born (again)  into La Costa Nostra, a life of violence and deceit. He quickly rose in the ranks to Captain of the Mafia...and according to the Fed's and Fortune Magazine, Franzese was the top money earner since Al Capone. Destined and groomed for boss at the height of his career, he was raking in $6-8 million dollars a week in scams...accumulating more power all the while.

I watched this charismatic, handsome, impeccably groomed man begin his testimony with a commanding accent to stop you in your tracks.

"Jesus Christ, our Risen Savior is my hero." were his first words. Okay, I am captivated.  He went on to talk about the gory details of exaggerated violence, different morality, deceptive ways and the greed that was a fast flowing faucet that came with the Life.  He escaped five white-collar crime indictments up against Rudy Giuliani who threatened him with 100 years....

In the mob, they have a saying which I like to practice. "CUT TO THE CHASE"

So I will, he met a woman who changed his life and told him about the Lord. This was the catalyst that moved Franzese to do what no other made man has ever done and gotten out alive;  He quit the Mafia. And surrendered to a new Boss.

He spent 3 years of prison in the hole on complete lock down completely hungering for a deeper relationship with Jesus and consuming the Word of the Lord. In which he says is the only way for inner peace and happiness.  And like the Apostle Paul, he said he was the least likely Christian Candidate having lived a life in complete contradiction to God's will. Like Osama Bin Laden joining the GW fan club or Hitler converting to Judaism. But the greatest gift of Christianity is everyone is welcome and that God can use your life (no matter your past) to His Glory!  He turned his back on his old life and embraced the Eternal...

How's that for a happy ending?

Are your choices pleasing to God or to you?

The Usual Route (yawn)

" What you decide on will be done,  and light will shine on your ways." Job 22:28

Oh my, oh my God. I pray for patience and protection. I pray for guidance as I cruise down this rushing river of life. I pray for understanding through the mistakes and discernment in the quick decisions I make. As sharp rocks pop up in the middle of my path, put your hand on my choosing left or right. 

I believe that my daily actions are determining my immediate and eternal future. Despite, urgings from people I am meeting to pull back the reigns of my Christ belief, I believe there is only one way but many paths to be on in that journey. These opportunities come at us everyday. This blessing of free-will has a price called personal responsibility. A road not often taken...

Ah selection, Robert Frost wrote, "Oh, I kept the first for another day! Yet knowing how way leads on to way, I doubted if I should ever come back."  I have always loved this poem because of my ongoing obsession with choices and making the right ones! And by taking the one less traveled by, that has made all the difference.  I have heard stories of plenty that begin with words like this..."I always wanted. I was going to. It used to be my. I dreamed of. Life or time just got in the way. 

 These precursors lay a breeding ground of resentment and a basket full of what ifs?  No thank you.

I did not want New York to be that forever unknown.

I've come to a few preferences in my life. Some have brought pain, shame, regret, and reward.

But the times I've looked down as far as I could not knowing what was around the bend have always had the fairer claim. 

I play fair, just not safe.

Do you believe in Never Too Late?

 

Singing for My Supper

"Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord." Ephesians 5:19

It's 2 AM. The long subway ride home filled with more eye candy to feast. Rooftop party at Hotel Empire, fireplaces ablazing, dance floor hot with spectacular view of Central Park ..Whee!. At this pace I will be sleeping the remainder of my birthday weekend.. But as Def Leppard says, it's better to burn out, than fade away...

New York City is a town of many extremes. The vivacity and power in foot traffic alone is enough to intensify the pep in your step. Up stairs, around corners, on trains, in taxis, down one ways, at all angles there is continuous motion. A cacophony of sounds  pulsating from subways screaming, horns honking, tires treading and heels clicking the pavement is always a flutter making your heart race to the rhythm. And  oh amazing power that this city gives and takes from you is strong and constant.  The lows are so deep and the highs are soaring. But all that activity and all of its endurance can flip on the down beat, the second you venture indoors.

Spent the majority of my day walking this grand city with a purpose. Through Tribeca, SOHO, West Village, up the Hudson into Chelsea, through the flower district...and back home again. Randomly ran into two people I've recently met (one works for ESPN Magazine..j.o.b.), all the while listening to a playlist of NWA remakes. Seriously Eazy E meets Robin Thicke...and I'm the crazy one cracking up on in the middle of the street...

Blessed with the company of an old friend, three dozen red roses, chilled rum shots, reggae dedication, shared cab, and three blocks later. The fast paced ticking of the Manhattan song came to a standstill as we sauntered down into Marie's Crisis Bar and the sounds of Gershwin filled my ears...OH WOW! 

Named from a famous line from Thomas Paine, this little gem of a establishment was playing and belting out the good ole Broadway show tunes in full dramatic fashion. The piano player and about 6-8 musical theatre hopefuls were all bellied up and in sassy character. From Oliver to South Pacific, this crowd was in glorious rare form..With dirty martini in hand I joined in the festivities. No Happy Birthday was sung, but a couple Les Miserables songs and  full-body reenactments of West Side Story and Chorus Line favorites, I was in my hey-day. I sang until my heart's content, unabashedly, without abandon, and in celebration of the day and days to come.
"I feel charming, 
Oh, so charming 
It's alarming how charming I feel! 
And so pretty 
That I hardly can believe I'm real." Maria-West Side Story 

Take note: if my writing is spotty or you haven't seen me in quite some time. A sure bet..I'm giving requests and feeling the glow of the stage...give my regards to Grove Street.

Could you have danced all night? 

Chasing the Horizon?

"I will sing to the LORD all my life; I will sing praise to my God as long as I live." Psalm 104:33

Feeling amazingly blessed today, I'm choosing to spend my favorite day of the year enjoying the view and living...away from the computer.

Twenty ears from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. - Mark Twain

Choose to chance the rapids and dare to dance the tides. -Garth Brooks

 Nothing is worth more than this day.  ~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

The living moment is everything.  ~D.H. Lawrence

It is only possible to live happily-ever-after on a day-to-day basis.  ~Margaret Bonnano

The future is no place to place your better days.  ~Dave Matthews

 Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint on it you can. -- Danny Kaye

And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.-- Abraham Lincoln

Success to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome.  Booker T. Washington

You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. Wayne Gretzky

One day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure it's worth watching.

Is It?

Stop, Look, Listen, Drink

"Command those who are rich in this present world not to be arrogant nor to put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment."
1 Timothy 6:17

Here is what I don't understand.    When street and subway performers, be it singers, thespians, or mariachi bands showcase their talents, why most of the train patrons don't raise an eyebrow. Literally, they keep their heads down and into whatever book they're reading at the moment. As if the booming voices and live spectacle isn't enjoyable or enticing enough to use your neck muscles. Today, I even saw a woman  who I thought was reaching for loose change put on her headphones as three men sang and grooved to a rather harmonious doo-whop in the first car of the R Train. What are they scared of? Could it be they are really not interested in the long-haired man in a black catsuit playing his electric violin like it's a red-hot Les Paul...Or are they afraid if they enjoy the entertainment, they'd have to anty up a contribution... It can't possibly be the novelty has worn off...can it?

Another oddity about NYC  is the blue laws...Yes, they have them here too. Wine sales are not allowed in grocery stores...That means the Whole Food shoppers who pick the perfect shitakes, truffled infused cheese, veal loins and have them delivered to their doorstep have to go to another destination to compliment the gourmet meal with the choice bottle of Petit Verdot. This does not speak highly of the "convenient factor" Manhattan boasts.

You can buy beer at 8 AM on a Sunday morning wrapped tight in a brown paper bag... but no vino at the sto'.

 It's hard to believe (no booze on Sunday)Georgia is actually one of the 35 states that is progressive in that respect. Not too mention, the amount of revenue  it would generate by the stores paying a franchise fee to sell wine.  Call me crazy but my guess is there is a deficit in this city after a certain fallout on a Street beginning with W.

Knowing that the booze business has still be going up in this world of going down, (self-medicating)  I combed all of the separate grape juice stores in my area soliciting employment. I went to count them six in Tribeca alone. 

No go... but a bottle to ring in my Birthday's Eve...

And plenty of faith in tomorrow.

Is your treasure or your faith your firm foundation?

Everybody loves a Melodrama

"Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy? Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good, and your soul will delight in the richest of fare." Isaiah 55:2

Conflicted: My believing heart hears the words but getting my wanting mind to grasp it..another story. Imagine the possibilities, only working and playing to satisfy...

"The heart of a skeptic and the mind of a child, put my life in a box and let my imagination run wild pour the cement for my feet. The heart and the mind on a parallel course never the two shall meet. And how the dissatisfied with the satisfied." Indigo Girls

I wasn't going to let it happen..I refused to let the cold break my stride but three netti-pots, countless unrequited emails and one near fateful icy fall later, I'm nursing my head cold, my tweaked back muscles, and my damaged pride...oooh we having some fun now!

Just when I thought the rest of NYC was depressed with me, I voyeuristically gaze across the street into the drapeless windows. Everywhere around me, people are ballroom dancing, hanging art one handed as the other hand juggles a martini glass,  swinging from the ceilings on trapeze contraptions (Seriously, I think it's an OT office). 

Life seems to be moving along splendidly.  

Looks can often be deceiving, I was fooled today. The cloudless blue sky and bright sunshine poured into my tiny room and beckoned me to rise and shine and take on the day...quickly and painfully hit with the shocking truth of 8 degree windchill, I recoiled indoors.

Spent the better part of today job hunting on-line with a slice of desperation.  

I've commenced to applying for jobs that even I don't want....And I know won't satisfy.

The darker side of my choleric- melancholy personality rears its head occasionally and I fight it with music...when that doesn't suffice, I pray for discernment between my wants and needs.

No, I don't want to eat canned chix noodle soup for the fourth time this week in the gastronomical capital of the world, but.

A reality check of things I need...not including job, home, groceries.

List to follow:

1. Rent Money $$

2. Waterproof/Somewhat Stylish Walking Shoes $$

3. A strong cup of coffee with half and half daily $

4. My husband's support

5. A clear head (priceless)

6. Good night's rest (8 hours w/o  Ambien) 

7. Decent red wine with dinner a couple days a week $$

8. Friends/Employers that do what they say, and say what the do

9. Creative Inspiration (good book) $

10. Prayer

Now the next step to be satisfied with my needs.

Can you be happy with a short list?

Your Mountain is Waiting

"Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones." Proverbs 16:24

March has roared in like a lion with a foot of snow covering Manhattan. 

Exhausted from an unfulfilled hike to Bible Study (cancelled due to inclement weather) I'm finally home by the heat watching the flakes fall.

As my frozen fingers thaw on the keypad I search for inspiration....  

Dr. Seuss and I share the same birth month. One I hope goes out like a lamb.

In honor of his birthday and resting up for my occasion I thought I would let his words give encouraging medicine tonight.

"If you never did, you should. These things are Fun, and fun is good." 

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."

" Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is youer than you."

“I’m sorry to say so but, sadly it’s true that bang-ups and hang-ups can happen to you.” 

"So be sure when you step.   Step with care and great tact. And remember that Life’s a great balancing act."

"Think left and think right and think low and think high. Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try."

"So the writer who breeds more words than he needs, is making a chore for the reader who reads."

-Dr. Seuss

Feeling Better?

Hide it? Snuff it? No!

"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden." Matthew 5:14

On my flurry filled bagel walk this AM, I stopped short to bend over and read the front cover of The New York Times  that was blowing in the wind. Smack dab in the middle of the page was a couple holding hands, heads bowed in prayer over the loss of the husband's job.

The New York Post featured an article today about the fear and unknown of these trying economic times and how people are turning to God for the first time ever. 

How men who have lost their jobs are turning to the friary.

People are scared. Their situation's unsteady. Their lives in disarray.

With uncertainty abundant, Church attendance is up....MMMmm

Mosaic: (adj) composed of a combination of diverse and broken elements.

 Mosaic Manhattan Church a brisk walk from my apartment and a stone's throw from Ground Zero opened my heart this morning. 

Hallelujah, I came to Manhattan thinking I would find a land desolate of Christ loving churches and there I was standing again amongst the broken, just like me.

The title message was, Making the most you can at work...or out of work. 

Be it prison or paradise, You are there for a specific reason.

Once a persecutor of Christians, the Apostle Paul spent years in chains day and night spreading the gospel of the Lord.  Do you hear me? Because of his imprisonment, he wrote a large portion of the New Testament and preached Christianity worldwide.

The pastor implored us all to examine where we are in life. Why are we in New York during these difficult times and in all of our UNPLEASANT situations, like Paul what are we doing to advance the Kingdom of God? 

Wow! Not that was a question that took my breath away. 

A friend of mine told me shortly after I arrived here, I should water down my faith. Don't wear in on my sleeve.  I started examining my reasons for being here and now.

 A lot of it is satisfaction, pleasure seeking, a change of scenery.... 

But knowing that God is bigger than all of that, I'm gonna let it shine.

"Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven." Matthew 5: 15-16

Why are you where you are?