Hide and Seek

Search me, O God, and know my heart;  test me and know my anxious thoughts." Psalm 129:23

"I don't want a full house at the Winter Garden Theater, I want 90 people who just came out of the worst rain storm in the city's history. These are people that are alive on the planet until they dry off. I wish I had a theater that was only open when it rained." Bill Murray

Woke up in a strange bed and to an odd view.

Feeling foreign in my own skin.

Manhattan skyline whited out. Even the honking is muffled. 

Alone on the 21st floor. Broadway is empty. The crane has ceased. The rain however, has not.

Thursday morning Classical on NPR. A pounding headache. I'm fitful.

Can't you see it's a mask that I wear? The stress in my heavy shoulders. The lines in my face.

The angst is carried in my wobbly neck. The strain comes through my voice.

I'm tired. 

The constant worry. The fateful news. The fact that the telephone brings limited intimacy.

Lawyers,  Lying. Mortgages, Money. Insurance, Irreconcilable. Family, Feuds. Tenants, Tenacious. Vocations, Vacuous 

On the move one day. Floundering the next.

The smile I keep up. The false energy I sustain.

My desire to live passionately often is regulated by life's restraints and I fall prey to a world of pure melancholy. Love's never ending Roller Coaster.

Maybe it's just Gotham's weather.

Maybe it's because my peer's condone socialism.  

Wake up America. You still think government intervention is a plus or are you silently applying goo be gone to your once prided bumper sticker?

Am I weeping over the senseless travesty of the swatted fly.

Or is it my heart is still searching...

"This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence whenever our hearts condemn us. For God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything."
John 3:19-20

You may never understand

How the stranger is inspired
But he isn't always evil
And he is not always wrong
Though you drown in good intentions
You will never quench the fire
You'll give in to your desire
When the stranger comes along.

BJ

Could a bowl of creamy banana pudding perform the miraculous?