Grounded

Elijah went before the people and said, "How long will you waver between two opinions? If the LORD is God, follow him; but if Baal is God, follow him." But the people said nothing." 1 Kings 18:21

Would it be too conspiracy theorist like to think that all the solo dancers with horn rimmed glasses on each block dancing to their own groove were planted just to make me smile on this work less day or are they rehearsing for yet another IPOD commercial?

AND

Is it a clear sign that something has gone awry when four SWAT with AK-47's around their neck are poised on the 2,3 platform while hardworking MTA workers poke their head in every trashcan and run their hands over every drain?

AND

Should I have worried more for the FedEx Kinko's employees who couldn't calm the paranoid schizophrenic blue eye shadowed woman in a cloak accusing all of them for throwing away her identity even after they humored her and checked under all the counters?

These are a sample of questions on my mind on just another Manhattan morning.

Days off are overrated. So I'm held up at B Cup Cafe hammering out yet another resume to kiss and pray over before I send it off in an eye-catching red envelope to the Colbert Report with Neil Young's comfort providing a gentle push.

Its high time for some moral commentary that doesn't immediately get put into a left spin or a coiffed right wing box.

I understand I am getting older and following in the path that so many hippies turned yuppie turned baby boomer skipped, strutted, and strolled down. But I wish there were more woman telling 12 year old girls their worth is more than giving head with different colored lipsticks to other prepubescent boys. I resent that Christianity is equated with small minded people who aren't well read. I believe we should be hearing from equals who believe that Capitalism and prosperity are attributes to this country. Greed is the evil and soils success. I think the tide needs to turn from Religion and Hypocrisy being synonymous to Faith and Freedom going hand in hand.

I believe in marriage. I believe drugs should be legal. I believe in the right for a woman to choose. I believe in personal responsibility. I believe in funding the Arts in public schools. I believe Universal Healthcare will be a step towards a socialist government. I believe that knowledge can change behavior generation to generation. I believe America is the greatest country in the world and those who do not agree, should not stay. I believe people are people.

Most of all, I believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God and one drop of His blood saves us all.

I want to hear these sentiments from a blond, free spirit, Christian commentator who is firm in her beliefs, is not swayed by popular opinion, does not back down despite the unwarranted ridicule, and thinks self deprecating humor is the best medicine for a country that has lost her sense of humor.

This would be fresh ....and I know just the gal to do it.

Colbert, call me.

Are your beliefs on solid rock or sinking sand?